39:53

 "O My servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the mercy of Allah"

 "Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful"

by the dawn..

and by the nights..

and by the even and odds..

and by the night when it departs..

In truth, this heart longs for You, it misses You

Yet it wonder..

Why is love still not present and why do doubt arise

Why is the afection yet to bloom

In truth,

even if it pick up all the gems at the bottom of the ocean

Or even if it water with rainwater from Your seven skies

True love will still not be present

Nor the longing to make it bloom

It had tried to give a gift to You

But maybe because its content is not perfect, there is no glow

It tried to water so that it grows and blooms

But maybe because its water

Is not as fresh as the true nature 

So even if it picks up all the gems at the bottom of the ocean or water with all the rainwater from Your seven skies

The love will still not be present

And the longing will not able to make it bloom

To You, Lord, give Your love to me

Lord, grant my longing for You may I know if my gratitude is Yours

(Translated from a fav local group song back in high school)

Longingess..

 

The further I get from You

The closer You come to me

Oh, Most Gracious,

Who am I in Your sight?

The more I try to get closer,

The stronger Your test question me..

Oh, Most Perfect,

I am merely a smack of dust in front of You

How will I be when I face You?

Will You accept this humble servant of Yours?

O the Most Forgiving

In the shadow of the sun I am forgetful

The lies of the world are full of pretense

At dawn I surrender

Longing for the clear dew of Your Love

If my deeds were even counted, I would not yet be able to approach the gates of Your heaven

Oh, Most Gracious

Protect me from Your punishment

Your love; Ar Rahman, is what I desire

With Your Mercy, do forgive me

How will I be when I face You

Will You accept this humble servant of Yours?

Ya Ghafurr, You are the Most Forgiving

In the shadow of the sun, I am blinded by the lies of the world that are full of pretense

In the early morning I surrender

Longing for the clear dew of Your love, Ar Raheem

If my deeds were yearn , I would still not yet be able to approach the gates of Your heaven

Oh, the Most Gracious God

Protect me from Your punishment

One seek You Only throughout this grief in helplessnes..

(This is just a translated song which certainly portray my current feelings..)

Today when i open His letter, i came across this verse which i think is certainly meant for me..

"Verily, Allah knows those who believe, and verily, He knows the hypocrites " {Al-Ankabut, verse 11)

There are those among us, who say things which contradict on they're actual believe & trust..

Although people around might not know this, but do know, Allah has already known.

Ever wonder why we are at time been given generous gifts by Him and at other times, we're being severely tested with hardships and there are also among us who'll always been given good tidings while the other continuous hardships..?

Both good tidings and hardships are actually tests..

Tests to distinguish among us who are the true believers and who are the hypocrites..

Although Allah knows best who are the true believers and the hypocrites without even placing the tests to us.. yet He place it to give us perhaps as proves that will be displayed to us on the day of jusdgement when we questioned on the reason of the punishments we receive..

Walllahualam.. only He knows best

A reminder for me and those who read..

-pen off-

Have you ever read on the saying, "All good things must come to an end..?"

Well, you might just thought 'obviously duh!!"

But for one here, one have mislook /overlook on this..

Early this year, one was being gifted with a 'trial medicatios..'
at no cost..

And with this non-injecting medicines, alhamdulillah, there were no new symptoms arise..
He even ensure that the medicines somehow assisted the body to do physical activities without failure...

It has been roughly 5 months with this new 'drug'..

& when it seems all goes well,

failures will then sweep by and flow it all in a row..

The myelin are now attacking other areas which was before guarded from harm befalls..

It has decided for one to continously be in incontinence position..

One needs to ponder on the reason for it..

Was one ignorant towards His blessings...

Or was the given gifts wrongly used...?

For one to keep on constant alert on this..

"And present to them the example of the life in this world, like the rain which We send down from the sky, and the vegetation of the earth sprouts (growing thick) with it..and then it becomes dry remnants, scattered by the winds. And Allah is ever, over all things, Perfect in Ability" (chapter 18: versr 45)


Till then....

Recently, when i came across this song, it always touched my heart as it constantly reminding me of how great Allah gifted us, me each day..

Though the song is in malay language, it still manage to capture my heart..

Since the rainy season has come, it was reminded of the sky standing tall,  though the fall of the downpour are heavy with strikes of lightnin,  the sky still stand up high above without even a crack to begin with.. and have we not be grateful to Him on this..

Allah Taála has even stated it in Chapter 67, verse 3 & 4 where He has continuously asked us, did we found any weakness in His creation of the sky.. which somehow meant as this..

"..He, the Exalted in Might, The Forgiving, who created seven heavens in layers, we (people) do not see in the creation of the Most Merciful any inconsistency.. Though we may kept on or repeat to  gaze at the sky,  we'll never find any breaks in it....so, why do kept on ignoring His signs.."


O Lord, thank you for the protection you gave us, from being hit by the lightning and for keeping the sky still standing high..Alhamdulillah..

" Ya Tuhanku, segala puji bagiMu, bagaimana kemuliaan wajahMu dan keAnggungan kuasaMu.."
"O my Lord! All Grace is due to You, which is befitting to Your glorious presence and Your great sovereignty"

Every day we'll under go all kind of 'tasks'..

Be it a normal daily action such as walking around to the house, or writing a report at the work place or simply just by taking a bath..

why are these referred to ask 'tasks'..?

Well, to put it in a way, not all people could do the walking,, writing, or bathing as easy as it may seem.. one might accidently slip on a piece of tissue on the floor,
or one might have strained his/her hands while doing last night house chores which had caused difficulties in writing..
so, yeah.. these are 'tasks'..

However, in our daily routine, sometimes, there will come upon us a bigger tasks that nedded us to fulfill..

for example, the boss might suddenly call you up and told that there will be a meeting with client this afternoon and nedded you to do a short presentation..

So, when this incident occur, you might be overwhelmed with nervousness and worriness..

As what was experienced by Moses a.s., when he had killed a man previously and then was summoned to speak & face pharaoh..

and how did Moses a.s faced it..?

Moses a.s. simply prayed and supplicate to God..

Moses did not asked for instance success, but he asked for God to ease it for him..

in chapterv20;to-ha, verse 25-28:

   'my Lord, expand for me my breast,
    And ease for me my task,
    And untie the knot from my tongue,
    That they may understand my spech..'

Looking at how Moses a.s. react, he did not request for instance success,
but he requested for the task to be ease for him to fullfill


In other words.. The All Mighty God does not count whether do we succeed in our everyday task, but He actually look more upon the effort that was placed to do it & finish it..

So, for instance, person (A) might be one who can easily scored in his/her studies without putting much effort in studying it while another person (B) might have placed tremendous effort in studying it, but still yet to scored as (A) did, do know, with His Genersity, He'll reward (B) much more greater than (A)..

that how the beauty if His Fairness and Acknowledgement compared to the humans..

Anyway, from that verses (chapter 20:verse25-28),
it shows that simply supplicating is not enough..
there must be an effort, work on it...

Wallahualam.. only He knows best..

-till then-

now, since the labour day hol. falls on thursday, people seem to extend it by taking an extra leave till the end of the week..

and same goes to my parents..

They are actually leaving my bro and i the home to ourselves, for us to manage..

and now i felt the pressure and experience to manage a home, by being the authority to manage it well.

its actually a burden without i even realise it.. it seem simple, but hey, its not as easy as it look..

and now, i know, if possible, i just wanna own a small, home..

ok, i just heard the azan.. im off now..

-till then-

As i was browsing thru the net, i came across a 'tittle' that said 'is Jesus God?'

Out of curiosity, i clicked on the link... and read through on why jesus christ is believed to be a god..

just to respond to the 'article' , Jesus attributes, characteristics, which had made him look up on, were actually portrayed by all of the God's messengers... which placed jesus as one of the prophets,a messenger, as claimed & acknowledged in islam, by the true muslims..

and to say that jesus was different because Mary, jesus mother, where it was acknowledged in the holy Quran that she was the righteouswoman where she was even given a chapter (chapter 19) in the Holy Quran by her name, in arabic as Mariam, where Mary or Mariam was told that she'll be given a son although no men had ever touched her....

But in all,  the reason why Allah had made jesus birth as miracle, is to placed him to be one of the prophets..

During jesus teachings at that time, he never mentioned of him being the son of God or the   the God itself.

its just because of his good attributes, characterisrics, which was certainly rare at that time, together with his special existance had made people around to look up upon him and believe him to be the son of god or the god himself..

yet Allah Ta'ala has clearly responded to this by saying

'The Messiah,  son of Mary, was not but a messenger; other messengers have passed  on before him. His mother was a supporter of truth. They both used to eat food. Look at how God made clear to them His signs,yet they are deluded away from the truth'
(chapter 5,verse 75)..

The people who had lived with jesus, had known there will be another prophet after him..

but then, there are also whom tried to blinded the truth by tampering with the true source..
for the true book would have been inline with the quran..

wallahu'alam..only Allah knows best..

As we wake up each morning, being given another day to breath in His blessfulness air, have we ever thought thanking Him for the yet,another chance to live it in..

why do the new day being mentioned  as a 'chance'..?

It had become a routine to us for every day after a peacefull night, able to wake up for the new day.. And one day, it just might be the day where we'll no longer being given the gift to continue on breathing in His Mercy...

or we have gone through yesterday, without being involved in anything that might have taken us away..

And at that moment, when we are unable to go through another day.. there will rise up all kind of regretfulness for the unfinished business.. and by that time, the regret will no longer be of any use since it could never be mend..

.. so as i'm writing this, Great Thanks to Allah Ta'ala for still giving yet another chance..another day..

and if you're reading this, He is also still giving you the chance to amend  its just a sign that He is still giving the chance of for us to rub off the sins that have scarred off the beauty of the smooth plate of deeds..


it also might be for us Glorify Him, when we may have ignore to do so..

a reminder for me, who had ignore all His signs..

-till then, pen off-

‘Apabila Allah menghendaki kebaikkan hambaNya, maka Ia akan dipercepat siksa baginya di dunia.. '
(HR Tirmidzi)

‘Siapa dikehendaki oleh Allah mendapat kebaikan, maka ia akan ditimpakan musibah (sesaat).’
(HR Bukhari)

‘Sesungguhnya, kualiti pahala terletak pada kualiti cubaan. Siapa Redha, Makai akan mendapatkan redha dari Allah dan siapa kecewa, maka ia akan mendapat murka dari Allah.’
(HR Tirmidzi)

‘Siapa dikehendaki oleh Allah mendapat kebaikan, maka ia akan ditimpakan musibah (sesaat).’
 (HR Bukhari)

' Sesungguhnya, kualiti pahala terletak pada kualiti cubaan. Siapa rela, maka ia mendapatkan redha (dari Allah) dan saiapa kecewa, maka ia mendapat murka (dari Allah) '
(HR TIrmidzi)

 So, basically, seseoarang itu akan diuji oleh Allah apabila Allah mengkehendaki kebaikkan baginya, dan tahap ujian itu hanya Allah yang mengtahui sejauh mana tinggi ujian itu pada hambaNya..

Mungkin ujian ‘A’ kepada seoarang hamba terasa amat perit & pedih sedangkan pada hamba yang lain, nampak seperti hanya ujian kecil sahaja. Jadi kalau dilihat pun pedih ujian yang menimpa kepada seseorang, lagilah pedih buat yang melaluinya.
Mungkin dari situla kata2 “Berat mata memandang, berat lagi mahu memikul” hadir..

With all the recent events that occur lately, with the vanishing flight, continuous bus crash cases each day, does it ever cause us to think, why all of these befall now?

There must be something Allah want us to look upon & ponder that had caused us to be tested in such manners..

And we can just blame on the upper level position, but we need to look at each of us.. For us to ponder, think and improve ourselves here.
For me to improve myself..

-till then-

As i've suspected earlier, where an old guy who rapped a girl told that he actually inteded to marry her will soon be followed by others..

and yeah, in today news, there is another guy, who raped a disable girl, said he intended to marry her..
http://www.thestar.com.my/News/Nation/2014/04/15/Rape-accused-changes-plea-and-wants-to-marry-victim/

hm.. it'll soon be a trend..

well, to those guys out there, if you really intended to marry her, then why don't you marry her first then?

Why do we called it friendships when in fact, the interactions only occur when one is close to the other..

when the seas come in between the bond,
& when the current worklife sway away the remembrance..
until the the beam that was once balance, topside & tuple it over sending the side to crash down below..

Just last nite, a friend whom i fond to be with & always loved due to Allah, had passed away, leaving me with just the memories we had together..

& im blaming myself as i were not keen enough to look for & contact her while she's still here walking around the earth..

i were not aware of her presence back in with our nations..

and were not aware she had actually tied a knot with a man whom had joined her as the martyred.

may Allah grant His Pleasantness with His everlasting Mercy to both of them..

insya'Allah..

What is your great interest..?

Well, for me, my greatest interest is too travel..

regardless the travel lay for luxury or for a working trip, i like both..

well, if the trip intended to attend a meeting, i'll be anxious with no doubt..

but the reason my keen to travel other than sight seeing the beauty of His Greatness,

i want my head to mark it place all over the world for bowing down & postrate to Him..

as a sign that i have indeed bowed to The All Mighty regardless where i am..

in hope that it will help me somehoe later upon facing the judgement in the hereafter..

well, i hope it does assist me on the day of judgement..

-till then...-

Since entered this new year, my life has been more & more  filled with humongous work..
well of course its the office work..

Its like my life is at the workplace..2/3 of the day is at the office..

bfast, lunch, dinner with work..

sleep with thinking bout work..

i have enough of this..

so yesterday evening i decided to go back home
 without bringing anything relared to work..

&Alhamdulillah, i finally had the best sleep of the month..

well, tomorrow it will all start again..

o Lord, ease every step and path i'll face for me & give me the strength to face & endure it..

Never stop giving or later one will be begging..

Though one forgets easily, never stop learning..

 it might just be the red light that'll route out the way..

Keep on walking as the stones & needles that hurt till one bleeds..had kept one to keep going on to succeed

And for all the scar it left, will make one ready to enter the next incoming battle field..

last Sunday.. my bro and i decided to attend a wedding ceremony located more than 60km from our place..

well, it was my decision and my bro was there to be my map reader..

we decided to started early as we wanted to enjoy the lunch at that event..

the trip was a shock to both of us.. as there was an event where both of us nearly involved in a major crash..

 i have to apologize to the car i nearly hit.. and thank you to the petrol truck driver who alerted us..

well, to cut it short.. our GPS showed that we have to turn right at at junction.. 

and after turning right, there is a huge truck at the front.. since i did not saw any kind of vehicles on the road besides our car and this truck, my mind automatically  thought the road was one way.. went to the right.. since this truck was really long, heavy and slow..i thought i will never reach in time if i kept on driving behind this truck..

all of a sudden, there is a lour and long horn.. and i was immediately alerted.. there is an incoming car on the opposite site and we were about to crash into each other..

i was so shocked but luckily my shocked alerted me to react fast to be back on the safe side, overcoming the truck..

after the incident we were silent for a while in the car as i drove..

and how thankful to Him for enabling me not to be anxious at that moment,scene..

now i learnt.. to just keep driving even though driving slowly..

its better safe than sorry..

Starting a new 'therapy', with prescribed way expensive pills, are somewhat terrifying in the same time glad there will no longer be any injections needed..

this new medicine way of treatment is by reducing white blood cells (WBC) from existing in the body..

since WBC functiond is to protect some of the body parts but in MS patients, instead of protecting it, it will react to attack the body itself.. thus  it is seen as essential to reduce the number of WBC in the body..

nevertheless, though it seems as good, this medicine also has it drawbacks..
the most common and bother me that it has a fatality rate connecting to this medicine..

this medicine slow down the heart rate...until it can cause people's heart to stop altogether..

anyhow, all praise to Allah for this gift.. may my body fits for this new medicine..


Ref: http://www.gilenya.com/index.jsp

recently, i came across a few people,
whom i've came to known nearly a decade ago...

and during our talk, there are times when they will come up with a few names, whom they to insist that i've should have known..

hm.. honestly, they listed names doesn't trigger anything in my mind..

frankly, i do not remember names easily.. even though i've come across with several times..

and yeah, i can recall a familiar faces but not the corresponding names to it..

so, though we've meet and encounter in an event couple of times in the past,
i'll only remember you if you've completed a circle in my life..

no offence tho.. its not about u that make me wanna forget u..

but its more on my brain capabilities to keep u in my memory cell here..


"O Allah help me to remember You, to thank You and to worship You properly."


-till then-